Why is it so important to be a good communicator ?
Everyone’s success in getting what they want or need largely depends on the effectiveness of their communication.
In life, almost everything you want or need to live and survive will depend largely on other people to permit, assist in or provide, to some degree.
Therefore, the better you are at communicating the better able you are to succeed at life.
There are two fundamental reasons why human beings communicate:
Expression of needs and wants: |
Social interaction/exchange: |
- Acceptance
- Rejection (protest)
- Indication of choice
- Request for assistance
- Request for action
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- Give attention
- Request attention
- Reciprocal action
- Salution (greeting) / leave-taking (closure)
- Comment, opinion & self-expression
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The simple fact is that you are always communicating – it’s impossible not to (unless you are dead) because everything you ‘say or do’ or ‘don't say or don't do’ is sending a message to other people.
From the cradle to grave, the very heart of our existence is based on our communication abilities.
Right from the get-go, infants, unable to directly converse or adapt their own surroundings, are utterly reliant on others to survive.
To compensate they have a basic but very effective form of communication – they cry.
Their motivation for crying is usually rooted in one or more of 5 basic needs:
- I’m hungry (feed me)
- I’m uncomfortable (change me)
- I’m too hot/cold (adjust my environment)
- I’m bored (stimulate me)
- I’m overwrought (soothe me)
Often the tone and delivery of the cry denotes which need is being expressed and invariably parents’ sensitivities are fine tuned to recognise the topic of the hour.
If not, then the adult will run through the check list of possible options to find the relevant issue at hand.
The adult response to this ‘conversation’ is invariably quick.
Babies are very adept at training parents, thanks to the effectiveness and power of their ‘specialised form’ of communication.
If the right response fails to come, then the communication (cry) is repeated (and repeated), often with increased volume, until such time as it elicits the desired outcome.
The communication lesson is not lost on either the child or the parent.
In fact this introduction of the concept of ‘stimulus / response’ will be carried through in all future communication development of both parties – more on this next time… |